Wednesday, July 31, 2013

Terrified of my Children

I have a friend; amazing mom, fabulous children. She has made the comment a few times that she is terrified of her children. I always found that hilarious because like I said her children are fabulous, no lie- I love them! And she is an amazing mom!

But the other night I really understood what she meant. I woke up around the time I would have to wake Aubrey up to eat. And all I could do was lay there, full of anxiety.

She has not been the easiest to feed. In the hospital, when she wouldn't nurse for long enough, they made me give her formula. Which only resulted in me sitting there crying for the next hour.

We had her 2 week weight check last Thursday, the doctor was not satisfied she had gained enough weight so off to the lactation specialist we went.

This week is going better, they think she only needed more time to get out of her sleepy stage.
I am still terrified of this child.

And Liam...

He has been GREAT with Aubrey.  He really loves her and cares for her.  He always has to know where his baby is, and is the first to tell me  "You need to feed my baby" when Aubrey starts to cry.

But yes, I am terrified of this child too.

His energy and volume has just been so hard to handle.  It does not seem to bother Aubrey at all, but it gives me so much anxiety.  And really he is just acting like a 3 year old, I know this in my head, but still- ANXIETY!

Let me just take a deep breathe and adjust to my new normal
It Won't Be Like This For Long by Darius Rucker on Grooveshark
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  1. I hear you! I have a 2 1/2 month old and an almost 3 1/2 year on the edge! Lol! Hang in there! I hope things get better with Aubrey and her eating! Nursing was rough for me for a while and it wasn't with my first, so it was a shock. Things are going much better now. I think the first few months of adding number 2 are hard!!!

    1. I have had a few friends tell me nursing was harder the second time around- Not something I was expecting. I just have to keep reminding myself it will get better.

  2. she is so cute! i'm sorry you're having a hard time feeding her. I feel good most of the day and then when it starts to get dark i get super anxious as the night time is so hard! i wish i could snap my fingers and make it be morning!

    1. I remember with my son, around 7pm I started just carrying him walking in circles around the house. He would cry until about 1am.
      Aubrey doesn't cry much (although she's screaming at Brian as I type this :)) but she likes to eat every hour at night :(