Monday, August 19, 2013

Getting Back to Being Me

Check out the shirt!  It used to belong to an uncle of mine.  I got it out of my grandma's yard sale years ago.  I cannot tell you how many times my mom tried to get rid of this gem!

I know I always talked about getting motivated to run before I got pregnant, but now that I think about it, I was just trying to talk myself into wanting to run because I thought I should. Running just wasn't important to me after I had Liam; my priorities changed.
While, yes I do still agree my priorities changed, I also feel now that I just never got back to being me after having Liam. Before Liam I didn't have to talk myself into being a runner, or into working out in general, I was a marathon runner
This week I laced up my mizunos, charged up my Garmin and started back at "running". I am still recovering for my c-section, major abdominal surgery, so I knew I needed to take it slow. I decided this week I would only run 1 mile each day. But let's me honest, I say run, it was more of a crawling jog. I'm okay with that, I actually used my Garmin to make sure I wasn't trying to push myself too hard, I wanted to jog a snail's pace. Like I said; I'm still recovering.
Me on our honeymoon

And yes, I'd be lying if I said there wasn't also egotistical motives at play here.  I wasn't happy with my body before getting pregnant, I just want to get to a place a feel comfortable in my clothes.  Don't get me wrong, I was never where I would have considered myself overweight but I had gained enough weight for people to question if I was pregnant before I was, on a few different occasions.

True story. Here's an example of a conversation:
EL: "Are you pregnant?"
Me: "no"
EL: looks me up and down
"You've never had a belly like that before"
Me: "nope, I've just gained some weight. Thanks"

Do I think I am going to look like I did on our honeymoon?  Not likely, I'd have to loose about 30 pounds still and I just don't think that's possible while breastfeeding and my children (Aubrey in this case) have to stay my priority.
me at the beginning of my pregnancy.  I am happy to say these pants official button on me again, and maybe in a few weeks I will feel comfortable wearing them

So where am I now?  Within 10 pounds of my weight when I got pregnant, but I did find out about the pregnancy on a cruise, so maybe more like within 15 pounds :)
I also have about 2 inches to loose from my waist (this I know from my P90x measurements- I started right before the cruise but could not continue with it due to the pregnancy)

So my realistic goals:  Be healthy and feel comfortable

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